her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
