are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
no you cant smoke seaweed
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
