HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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