This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
