I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Shame - the story of my life.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
