so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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