She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Is it because I queefed?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Randomize
