I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
