No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
