Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
i think my cat just said my name.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize