we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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