I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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