So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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