i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
