Operation Purity has been aborted
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
why is half of my head shaved?
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