honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
