I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize