dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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