there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize