You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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