i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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