I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize