McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
