so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
