yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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