I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
