I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize