Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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