Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize