508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
