i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
We smell like vodka and hangover
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