I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
