It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Randomize
