i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
