I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
