I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize