I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
