Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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