why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize