At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize