I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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