I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
