everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
