have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
