Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
