You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
