we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
