that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize
