i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I have surprise drugs for everyone
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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