I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
