Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize